What Shall It Be Today

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Monday, October 12, 2009

On a rare occasion that I actually spent time with a co-worker outside of work, she told me that I could vent about my recent breakup. I talked about it as much as I could. Apparently that wasn't enough for her, because hours later, she asked, "So, two years, you feel nothing or...?"

I felt offended. "How could you even say that?"

How could you even say that? I often find myself asking that question, usually not out loud, whenever people make assumptions about me when they don't bother trying to find out. I think that's one of the biggest pitfalls of being an INFJ. We're so naturally intuned to emtions and clues that things which appear obvious to us are not obvious to others, but then we're sometimes misunderstood.

Aside from that, I just don't get how people who don't bother spending time to get to know me expect me to share with them my innermost thoughts. My ex told me that it's because that's too much work for people - especially here, a region infamous for its superficiality - but then they miss out on getting to know a great human being. In some ways it's pretty amazing that he would say that, because he's a pretty great person himself, and also because we are quite opposite. He's one of those people who everyone likes because he's outgoing, funny, and tells you all the nitty-gritty details about himself, even if you've just met.

It dawned on me today that we represent the two animals that we love/prefer. He's like a dog. Ever saw the movie "Up!"? Doug the dog's collar, translating for Doug upon Doug's first meeting of a guy, "I've just met you but I love you!" Happy, loyal, personable, playful, and all over the place. Me, I'm the cat. Quiet, thoughtful, mysterious, somewhat unpredictable, self-sufficient, and put together. I'm snuggly and affectionate, but only after I've gotten to know you and like you.

So, Dear World: Just because I don't wear my heart on my sleeve doesn't mean I don't feel anything.